Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize