wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize