Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
