At least make sure they are 18
Why
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
