i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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