How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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