I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
it's great music for shaving your balls
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
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