do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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