I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize