I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
