you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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