I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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