the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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