She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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