Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
