I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
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