what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize