y did u give ur computer a hand job?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I am one with the molecules
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize