I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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