I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We talked him into tasing himself.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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