He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
