"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
