After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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