Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I think your dad took our porno
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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