Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
