in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
