A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
