we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
