Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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