Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize