He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
