I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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