We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
