First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
