Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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