I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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