Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
