i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize