Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
