I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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