so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize