Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize