what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize