you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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