how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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