I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
