I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Can I color on your dick again?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I want a musical about memes.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize