In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
