Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
