dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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